Wednesday, December 23, 2009

This is hilarious!!

1am~alarm clock rings.
2am~hunting partners arive, drag you out of bed.
2:30~throw every thing except the kitchin in truck.
3am~leave for deep woods.
3:15~drive back home for gun.
3:30~drive like hell to get to the woods befor daybrake.
4am~set up camp-forgot damn tent.
4:30~head into woods.
6:05~ see 8 elk.
6:06~take aim squeeze trigger.
6:08~load gun while watching elk going over hill.
8am~head back to camp.
9am~still looking for camp
10am~realized you dont know where camp is.
noon~fire gun for help-eat wild berrys
12:15~run out of bullets 8 elk come back.
12:20~ strang feeling in stomach
12:30~REALIZE you ate poison berries
12:55~rushed to hospital to have stomach pumped.
3pm~arrive back in camp
3:30leave camp to kill elk
4pm~retern to camp for bullets.
4:01~load gun leave camp agin
5pm~empty gun on bird that is bugging you.
6pm~arrive at camp-see elk grazing at camp.
6:01~load gun.
6:02~fire gun.
6:03~one dead pick up truck!!
6:05~hunting partner reterns to camp dragging elk.
6:06~repress strong desire to shoot hunting buddy.
6:15~take truck,leave buddy and elk in woods.
6:25~truck boils over-hole shot in block.
6:26~start walking
6:30~fall drop gun in mud.
6:35~meat bear...
6:36~take aim
6:37~fire gun- blow up barrel (plugged with mud)
6:38~#@*#&@ pants.
3:39~climb tree.
9pm~ bear departs-wrap #@*#&@ gun around tree...
MIDNIGHT~home at last

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Pregnancy Calculator: Ovulation Calendar : Fertility & Conception - Week by Week -

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